I'm so glad I get to scrub the floors.

Folks, it's begun.

The annual cleaning-of-the-house-before-the-holidays ritual has commenced.

This includes:

1. Creation and assembly of delicious human snacks. I made kafta with little pita breads and bought tiny cakes. Y'all.

2. The blending of canned tuna fish and nibblies for Carter. He is loving this.

3. A lit candle and the burning of wonderful incense.

4. The donning of soft, thick, matching jogging outfit with thick, soft socks. (I already got the pedicure).

5. An action flick playing in the background. Today's choice: The Union, starring Halle Berry, Jessica DeGouw, Alice Lee, Dana Delaney, and Lorraine Bracco.

I'm ready.

The Swiffer mop is loaded up, dishes are ready to be suds-ed, and the laundry is awaiting folding.

The past four years have changed this ritual intimately, as I am now a homeowner.

I'm…a Homeowner.

It does not ever get old saying that. It never will.

I wasn't allowed to burn incense when I rented, and now I've got the good stuff. Lena Horne loved incense as well. In fact, it was stipulated that when her apartment sold, the rugs would come with it, as they still had the aroma of incense in them.

When I rented in apartments I didn’t crank up the music because I didn't want to be disrespectful to my neighbors in such close quarters. Now, with the action movie coming through the Bluetooth speakers, it sounds like a movie theater in here.

I bought this house against almost everyone's advice. The start of a global pandemic was not the traditional time one would consider purchasing real estate, but all of the numbers said, “Now”, and I did.

I trusted my math degree (*said like a gangsta* Wayne State!), and the numbers now prove that it was the right move. The timing was essential: The numbers have adjusted, so if I had waited until now to purchase, when it appeared to be more correct to everyone else, I would not be able to afford this house today.

To be clear, I was not 100% certain until recently if the numbers would bear themselves out. I was hovering at about 56% in favor. But no matter what, I knew I could handle whatever happened, however it worked out. That part was 100% solid, and that is something I am very grateful for--learning how to trust myself again.

This house is the first real purchase after the divorce that I made on my own with no input from my family/friend network of trusted sources and based entirely on research and my heart's desire, and it was a big risk because of the amount of repairs I may have needed. Again, I used math, the library, good contractors, and my vision to make this decision.

Luck favors the prepared, dahling (Edna, The Incredibles, voiced by Brad Bird).

So, as I clean this house today from top to bottom, quoting lines with my friend as we scrub the floors, I do so fully aware of where I was five years ago.

I do so as the women in my ancestral chain cheer, for they were not able to own their own without a man or as brown-hued folk.

I clean with joy for the women in my family now who witnessed the recovery and cheer from the sidelines. They're cleaning too, today and tomorrow, at their homes!

I'm so grateful to have a home. I'm so, so grateful to have a place where my family can bounce back and heal, like I can at theirs. It's not super fancy like a lot of my friends’, it isn't expansive or Architectural Digest worthy, but it's mine and I'm free here, and those who walk through the threshold can be themselves.

Also, I get to say stuff like, “Git off ma lawn”. I have a lawn!

Grateful, indeed.

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